Wednesday, May 6, 2015

coconut oil ATTACK!

So remember how I posted about my top five favorite uses as a new mom for coconut oil? Basically I love coconut oil and I tell everyone I know about all the magic it does at my house, and I use it on EVERYTHING.

But have you ever had an unrequited love?

Apparently, coconut oil does NOT love me back.

Let's back up in this story, though, to a few months ago when I first had my baby. Before I had my baby I had this one favorite shirt. It's purple (one of the twenty-three colors I claim as my "favorite"), it was soft, and it fit juuuuuust right. Made me look skinny and great, and that, my friends, is a very important thing to have in a shirt.

But then I had my little bundle of adorable joy, and I started breastfeeding him.

Side note to brand new and future mamas... breastmilk can STAIN your favorite purple shirts!

It's true. Oil stains from the fat in the breastmilk. That do not, I repeat, DO NOT wash out in the laundry!

Oh, that poor shirt. It looked like I'd sent it through the dryer with a tube of chapstick. I was heartbroken. And no matter how many times I washed that shirt, those oil stains never went away. And I cried.

Okay, so "cried" is a bit of an exaggeration, but not much of one. I was very sad.

So two weeks ago I decided I wanted to save my shirt because I missed wearing it. So I got the super-duper action Oxy Clean spray and I went to town. I soaked my shirt in that stuff and let it set for A WEEK. And then I washed it. And then I soaked it in Oxy Clean again. And after that second wash, like magic, the breastmilk-oily-stains-of-evil were gone! Yay!

I pulled that shirt out yesterday, and for the first time in MONTHS, I put it on and felt like a queen because GUYS MY FAVORITE SHIRT WAS FIXEDDDDD!

And I looked awesome all day, because that's how great my purple shirt is.

Then last night, as I finished nursing my ever-so-cute little buddy, I reached over to grab my jar of coconut oil from the table next to my rocking chair so I could put some on his drooly chin-rash.

Another side note. If you are not familiar with coconut oil, let me clue you in. It has this cool feature where it's solid at cool temperatures and liquid at warm temperatures. Ever since I bought my coconut oil, it has been solid whenever I use it. End side note.

I pulled the lid off the coconut oil and the entire freaking jar spilled ON MY SHIRT!

Yeah. Let's just pause to let that sink in.

I didn't scream. I didn't laugh. I didn't cry. I just sat there in stunned silence, staring at my baby (who was laughing at me on the inside, I'm sure of it) as the coconut oil seeped through the fabric and into my skin.

Oxy Clean is my friend again for the day.

Excuse me while I go say another prayer on my shirt's behalf.

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